41 Thoughts for Super Bowl 41

1. Not surprised that Favre is coming back. Is anyone?
2. Favre’s decision has more to do with his love of playing than the Packers having, in his words, “a talented young football team.” Certainly the Packers were better late in the year, but they feasted on bad teams (Minnesota, Detroit) and teams with their minds elsewhere (Rex Grossman was more concerned with partying than football when the Bears met the Packers on New Year’s Eve).
3. Surprised at Favre’s timing. The Friday before the Super Bowl? A Super Bowl that actually might live up to its hype? Is Favre tired of hearing about how great Peyton Manning is?
4. Why break the story to the Sun Herald in Biloxi, Mississippi? Did Favre miss the deadline to the Cottage Grove Shopper Stopper?
5. Maybe the Sun Herald has some dirt on Favre and he agreed to give them the story in exchange for them burying whatever it is they have on him. I’m guessing it has something to do with who’s really behind that Aqua Teen Hunger Force marketing campaign.
6. It’s insane that the city of Boston treated light displays of a robot flipping the bird as a series of bombs. This is so ridiculous that all residents and administrators of the city of Boston should be forced to wear New York Yankee gear for the entire 2007 baseball season. Asinine.
7. Aqua Teen Hunger Force is now the best-known series on cable television. Marketing mission accomplished.
8. No matter how hard I try, I can’t root for Peyton Manning.
9. I like Manning’s commercials though. He’s funnier than Jay Leno.
9. The way the Manning family screwed with the NFL draft in 2004 made me a lifelong Manning hater. Well, hater’s a strong word. I’m a Celine Dion hater. I’m not a fan of the Mannings.
10. I love that the Giants have been mediocre and the Chargers much better since the Eli Manning/Philip Rivers swap. One of the best stories in football over the last couple of years. That and the total disapperance of Randy Moss.
11. Billy Joel is doing the National Anthem. I like Billy Joel, but he’s kind of a tool. Put a new album out, Billy. And stay away from the bottle. And cars.
12. For anyone that complains that the Rolling Stones are too old to be rock stars, look at the newly resurgent Bob Seger. Looks more like Bob Barker than Bob Seger. Except Seger’s fatter and has less teeth.
13. Love Lovie Smith and Tony Dungy. It’s too bad that we’re making a big deal about African-American coaches making it to the Super Bowl in 2007. Too bad because it should have happened about a long long time ago.
14. Did anyone know that Rob and Amber from Survivor and The Amazing Race have a reality show on Fox Reality about Rob becoming a professional poker player?
15. Does anybody care about Rob and Amber? Apparently not, or their show wouldn’t be on Fox Reality, where it has to compete for time with paid programming and Real Stories of the Highway Patrol.
16. I can’t believe Eddie Murphy didn’t thank Joe Piscopo during his Golden Globe Acceptance Speech. Dude made Murphy.
17. If Murphy wins the Oscar and doesn’t thank Joe, I’m boycotting Murphy’s movies. Wait, I’ve been doing that since I saw The Golden Child.
18. Rex Grossman is in a lose-lose situation. Either he’ll suck or he won’t suck. Even if he plays well, no one will give him respect.
19. It won’t matter, because he won’t play well. He’ll stink.
20. Peyton Manning will win the MVP.
21. Reggie Wayne will deserve the MVP.
22. Criminal Minds, the program slated to air after the Super Bowl, will get its largest audience ever.
23. People will be talking about Criminal Minds until . . . Monday morning, when it’s quickly forgotten amid talk of new episodes of 24, American Idol, and this adult cartoon show that brought the once-mighty city of Boston to its knees.
24. Edgerrin James will be watching the game and cursing his decision to leave Indianapolis for the Arizona Cardinals.
25. Dennis Green will be watching the game and cursing his decision not to get the double meat portion on his sub. Dude needs nourishment.
26. The Colts will out-run the Bears.
27. Rex Grossman will complete more passes to the Colts than to the Bears.
28. Devin Hester will run a kick off back for a touchdown. It will be called back because of an illegal block in the back.
29. The Bears defense will score more points than the Bears offense.
30. Adam Vinatieri will not need to continue his streak of clutch kicks.
31. I will not need to continue my streak of clutch drives to Piggly Wiggly to get more Funjuns. I stocked up this year.
32. My overindulgence on Funjuns will cause me to have that dream again about Chuck E. Cheese, Mayor McCheese, and Chester Cheetah. I can’t get into details here on a family site.
33. The Colts will win, 31-21.
34. Did I say I had 41 thoughts? I’m exhausted. Isn’t 34 close enough?
35. Enjoy the game.
36. Enjoy Phil Simms and Jim Nantz. Can’t they work Erin Andrews in there somehow? Does she work for CBS? Does it matter?
37. Letterman’s 25th anniversary show was disappointing. He’s still doing “Know Your Current Events”? Ouch.
38. Halftime entertainer Prince is going to have a wardrobe malfunction of his own, but since he’s only 2’11”, no one will notice.
39. The highlight of the game for me will be the Beatles/iTunes commercial. It’s about time you can download “The Continuing Story of Bungalow Bill” legally.
40. The best part about the Bears losing? No more Super Bowl Shuffle.
41. The best part about the Colts winning? Doesn’t matter unless they cover the spread. Come on, Indy — I need me a new HDTV!

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